alright dudebro i went to high school with
i see you posting bible quotes as your facebook status
and i see your profile picture with all your fraternity bros
and i see your steady relationship with your cute blonde girlfriend
i see all these things
but nothing changes the fact that in the seventh grade i caught you jacking off next to me in history class on the day we watched that documentary on nude male sculptures in ancient greece
you know you’re getting old when you watch the little mermaid and when ariel says “i’m 16 years old. i’m not a child anymore.” and you’re just sat there like yes you fucking are young lady stop it
but what do americans call biscuits
Wait what are British biscuits? these are american biscuits.
WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY?!
They are American biscuits.
…That is not a biscuit.
These. These are biscuits.
Those are cookies.
These are cookies:
Everything else is a biscuit.
THOSE AMERICAN BISCUITS ARE SCONES
when i was in elementary school i was told by my teacher to stop using exclamation marks for every sentence and that they should only be used for exciting things and i remember feeling confused because i thought everything was exciting
this is the saddest thing I’ve ever read